What Makes Us Real

“I thought / the fall would // kill me / but it only / made me real.” 

- Ocean Vuong, from the poem 'Skinny Dipping"

I was lying in bed one morning this week feeling different layers of excitement, anxiety, and fear about the upcoming retreats and events this year. I was feeling my fear of failure, and how vulnerable it is to share the heart of my soul craft. I rolled over to my side, hugged myself, and said to that fear, "I love you" and that part responded with sass, "Why just so that you can heal me away?" Gotta love sassy parts 😆

I said, "No, because you make me real." After I shared that, there was a deep sense of soothing, that felt like an embrace of trust. 

During a soul session this week, the woman I sat with reflected on her journey using a line from the poem above, and its resonance struck me. In the fall, in a feeling of complete demolition of our inner scape, we can come again into contact with our unique foundational reality.  

So often our desires and wounds live right next to each other - as we express one the other comes to life. When we are in that bold walk toward desires and visions, the parts holding fear can swiftly join the celebration, calling for safety, acknowledgment, and visibility.

Healing takes various forms, and oftentimes the alchemical movement is tending to our inner relationship. To feel safe with fear in our inner world, acknowledging its presence while recognizing it doesn't have to be our guide.

When we invite self-love, trust, and expand our capacity to feel secure in the unknown, the parts that hold fear are comforted. Then hope, trust, and our soul's voice can be felt the loudest.

In this process of tending to our inner landscape, we cultivate a relationship with all parts of ourselves—the wounded, the fearful, the brave, and the visionary. Each part has a voice and a role in our journey. The journey of healing is not about eradicating our fears or wounds but about integrating them into our wholeness. It's about recognizing that these parts are not our enemies but our teachers, guiding us towards deeper self-awareness and authenticity.

So, the next time you find yourself in the midst of fear or doubt, remember to pause, breathe, and offer love to those parts of you. Embrace them as you would a dear friend, knowing that they are an integral part of your journey. And in this embrace, you will find the courage to continue walking the path of your soul, fully alive and real.